Grief Recovery - Crisis

Why Do We Need a Crisis to Change?

Why Do We Need a Crisis to Change?

“Faced with crisis, the man of character falls back on himself. He imposes his own stamp of action, takes responsibility for it, makes it his own.”  ~Charles de Gaulle

We can all so easily fall into what is called a “Comfort Zone,” a place we know is familiar. It is like an old pair of slippers: although they are full of holes and the soles are worn to nothing and our feet are no longer supported or protected, we just can’t bear to part with them, they are sooo comfortable.


Let’s face it, adjustment is hard and many people avoid change like the plague—so much so that they choose not to change, even if it means being uncomfortable. So, the “comfort zone” is now an “uncomfortable zone.” As the saying goes, “Better the devil you know than the devil you don’t.”
Why is this?

I believe the underlying cause is most always FEAR. Fear of judgement from others, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of rejection, fear of loss, fear of the unknown.

We are afraid to make the necessary changes to be happy and healthy. Fear is a powerful undercurrent that can keep us stuck in places that are not serving us: a job we hate, a bad relationship, with friends who drag us down, or even an unhealthy state—emotionally, physically or both.

In this situation we need a crisis. A crisis forces us out of our comfort zones and shakes us to our core, where changing is no longer an option if we want to survive. It could come in the form of a layoff, our partner leaving us, a mental breakdown, or a life-threatening health diagnosis.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”  ~Viktor E. Frankl

I think there is a huge sub-conscious misconception that our fears are keeping us safe, when in fact they are only keeping us stuck. They are keeping us from changing for the better, they are keeping us from living the life of our dreams, they are keeping us from finding true love, and they are keeping us from being healthy and happy.

Don’t wait for crisis to strike in order to start changing what’s not working in your life. If you can’t alter the situation then change yourself, change your perspective, and change the way you are thinking about it. Just don’t resist change. Change is the great elixir and a given of life. Instead of making it something to fear, make it something that propels you forward. Life is about change; if you are not changing then you are not growing and if you are not growing you are not fully living.

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”  ~Neale Donald Walsch

Embrace change; it is your friend, not your enemy.

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