“Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life’s search for love and wisdom.” ~Rumi
“Tearless grief bleeds inwardly.” ~Christian Nestell Bovee
“If people would get in touch with their spirits, they would be able to heal, emotionally and physically.” ~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
“Do not brood over past mistakes and failures as this will only fill your mind with grief, regret and depression. Do not repeat them in the future.” ~Swami Sivananda
Unresolved grief is like a chain attached to parts of our past: it weighs us down and keep us from being fully available for creating and having the life we want.
With grief, comes feelings of fear, guilt, shame, anger, resentment and depression. These feelings are heavy and can block us from feeling joy, happiness, enthusiasm, peace, contentment and love in our life.
While In our minds we may feel we have let the past go, our hearts may be feeling otherwise. It is not until the memory gets triggered that we become aware of lingering feelings—and the pain associated with them—that we realize we have buried our grief deep within the recesses of our hearts. Grief is not gone but camouflaged by various coping mechanisms such as alcohol, drugs, gambling, overeating, excessive TV, overspending, promiscuity, anger and even violence.
Grief recovery is about resolving that which is unresolved, completing what is incomplete and making peace with the past. It involves finding the essence of our spiritual nature and discovering that, as human beings, we are all the same. We are all capable of making mistakes. We are all capable of hurting others. We are all capable of being unkind. Most importantly, we all have a story.
Wounded people hurt other people and themselves.
Healed people love other people and themselves.
Grief recovery is about healing our hearts and this can only be done at the level of true compassion and forgiveness. Only when we realize that everyone has a story (and that these stories can create the wounds we often inflict on one another) will we be able to open to the possibility of recovering from our grief through forgiveness and compassion, the essence of which is unconditional love.
We cannot achieve an optimal level of health and happiness when we are weighed down by chains linked to our past because these chains create behaviors counter to a healthy lifestyle and frame of mind. This is why tending to our unresolved grief is a key component to a healthy body and a healthy mind.
While eating a healthy diet, exercising regularly and meditating are important, without recovering from our grief we will find these things a struggle to maintain as the temptation to camouflage our grief will become too great.
This week pay attention to your upsets. Ask yourself what part of you is hurting, what unresolved wound or pain from your past is being triggered. Who do you still have to forgive? Do you still have to forgive yourself?
Our feelings are our messengers, letting us know where we have yet to heal. Listen to them; let them be your ally not your enemy.Click here to schedule your free call with Gina.