How Men and Women Love Differently

“Where there is love there is life.” ~Mahatma Gandhi

“Being deeply loved by someone gives your strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” ~Lao Tzu

“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.” ~Mother Teresa

“We are born of love; Love is our mother.” ~Rumi

“There is no remedy for love but to love more.” ~Henry David Thoreau

We are all familiar with popular books that state how men and women are from completely different planets. But the fact is, when it comes to love, men and women simply love differently


There are certain differences but also some similarities between how men and women love.


Men may communicate more simply than women do. Women can call up a girlfriend and talk about an issue for hours only to rehash it again the following weekend. Men often prefer to say a few words and then they are good to go, that is, they are finished with the topic.

Men may also be more task-oriented. For the most part, they communicate as if they are going from point A straight to Point B.


There may be a huge misconception about men and their feelings. Men have feelings too, but many times men are taught as young boys not to cry and to suppress their feelings. However, it is important to note men most certainly do have feelings and that does not make them any less masculine. In fact, it makes them more so.

It is also important to remember when communicating that while men have strong feelings, they may not show them as easily as women do.

Goals and Multi-Tasking

Back in the day, men had to focus on one thing and one thing only and that was to kill and capture food for the family. Women, as far back as we can remember, were able to cook the food, tend to the children, and care for the elderly.

Women may simply be better at multi-tasking than men because of their genetic makeup. So, when expecting a man to do multiple tasks, don’t be disappointed if they don’t get done the way a woman would complete the tasks.

Men may be able to focus more. Sometimes a man may forget to do one of many things on his agenda because of this intense focusing ability. Women may simply be more geared to doing many things at once.

Showing Affection

Again, it is possible that men show affection differently than women. Women may be more giving and nurturing whereas a man may show affection on occasion and not as intensely as a woman. This may go back to men being raised not to show affection as young boys.

These are just some of the ways that men and women differ in showing love. Of course, there is always compromise on both sides.

For men, the possibility exists that being in love may mean a lifelong commitment and that may provoke fear that he is not ready for something so powerful. Perhaps, a man in love still needs to feel some sense of control over his life. And then again, maybe not.

For women, being in love is more of a positive feeling in the early in love stages. Bliss and happiness are present before fear.

Sometimes simply understanding the differences and respecting them is what works best in a relationship. Not taking what you perceive to be a lack of emotion or a “wrong” reaction personally and trying to come to a middle ground is a good approach for both parties.

Of course, because we are complicated and multidimensional beings, relationships can also become complicated. For more information on how we personally–not just as men and women in general–love differently, check out the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman.

Want to find out your predominant love language? Go to this link to do a quick test:


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